Week 41?

Yes, I'm still here. I have not gone into labor on my own... it looks as though I will make it to my doctor's appointment tomorrow morning (10:00 a.m. with Dr. N). I've been wondering about what to post today because I don't want to come across as whiney and ungrateful... but, I just have to tell everyone how miserable and frustrated I am. Afterall, this is my online journal. So, I'll write what I am feeling today. I really dislike being overdue... it comes will so many emotions and questions such as:

*Will I ever go into labor on my own? (Analyzing every twinge all day long)
*Why aren't my contractions staying/getting stronger? (Random contractions for weeks now)
*Why didn't stripping my membranes work? (It hurt really bad and was supposed to get things moving!)
*Can I get this big, active baby out already? (Isaac is a full-term baby and his movements are very strong and uncomfortable at this point)
*When will I be induced and will that be more painful? (I really wish I could start on my own naturally)
*Will I be able to deliver naturally or need a c-section? (Chances increase with overdue babies and also with inductions)

I am hoping to get induced TOMORROW instead of Wed. morning... I think Dr. N will go for it. I just can't take all this waiting anymore... and physically, I'm exhausted. I'm not sleeping well because I'm so anxious and my whole body aches. I run out of breath just walking across the living room. Anything I eat, I burp right back up because of the indigestion (no room for food in my stomach anymore!). My thought is that if Isaac was estimated to be 9 lbs. at 40 weeks, then he's gained some more weight in the last week. He's at least 8 1/2 by now and that's a big baby... I want to deliver naturally if possible. So, even though I really did not want to be induced... I'm at the point where I just feel like it's the best choice for both Isaac and I.

P.S. Please don't tell me anymore "Old Wives' Tales" about bringing on labor. Those were funny last week, not anymore. (grumble, grumble)